Carlos Dinares believes that Anger and Jealousy are the biggest enemies of progress and speed in any rowing system. Carlos things that trying to change anger or jealousy once you are in the emotion is like trying to control a car on ice who is out of control. This means addressing the beliefs that trigger jealousy is the key factor to improve. Carlos Dinares believes that everyone should be happy for the good results of others and take responsability of its own failures.
Carlos Dinares believes that the rowers and coaches that develop Anger and Jealousy are insecure. Carlos Dinares knows that each year the rowers have a new chance to get selected and their results will reflect their speed and choices. Carlos knows that the best way to improve is to take responsability and get into action.
Carlos wants the rowers and coaches that experience ANGER and extreme JEALOUSY to take some action.
- Shift your point of view so that you can step back from the story in your mind and look at the big picture. Carlos thinks that this will give you sometime to refrain those negative emotions.
- Identify the core beliefs that trigger the emotional reaction. What is your goal? To just make the Team and get killed in the races or to go fast? What do you want to do with your rowing or coaching? You think that you are a better rower or coach because the ones who are getting results have a bad race and fail like you? Take some ownership of yourself and of what you do and have control over. Your performance as a rower and your coaching as a coach. Who cares what the other rowers or coaches are doing. Keep focus on what you have control over. Keep your eyes focus on the price you decide. Keep all your energy on the pie!
- Become aware that the beliefs in your mind are not true. This is different than “knowing” intellectually that the stories are not true. You think you know and you are right but you are wrong. The rower who wins the race is the winner and this is it. You like it or not. The one who makes the boat is the one who will race. This is it. You can blame others of your failures or justify unfairness all the time but the reality is that you are not racing or not winning and there is nothing you can do about it. It is the past and the only thing you can do is quit or become faster and more positive. Save your energy to improve as a rower and as a coach.
- Develop control over your attention so you can consciously choose what story plays in your mind and what emotions you feel. Take responsability of where you are and see how you can be better in the future. Be happy for the ones that are doing well and support the ones that are hurting and sad. Become positive and embrace improvement and development.